Circa May last year, PETA and noted PETA spokesbeard Jona Weinhofen came out with a super confronting campaign in fanged opposition to the shearing of sheepies. The lamb in Jona’s hands is not real, of course, and outraged farmers were correct in asserting nobody would fleece an infant sheep as repped here – so what the fuck, PETA? Ah. Well. PETA’s people had gone undercover in a bunch of shearing sheds throughout Australia and come back with footage that’s best described as fucked up. In stark contrast to the humane standards espoused by the industry at large, here’s consistent and undeniable evidence of farm kids ripping sheep to pieces and flinging them all over the place for their hides. The Australian wool patrol, as you might suspect, lost its collective dags – dags being the stiffened clumps of shit that collect like brown stalactites on the woolly bottoms of sheep yet to be shorn down to their nerve endings. “But not all shearers!” persistently cried the $2.8 billion-dollar industry. Agricultural minister Barnaby Joyce even weighed in with some foamy side-mouth comments about Jona being a splendid vegan or something.
In the interest of fairness, I hit up both sides about the ethical and commercial complexities of the issue – though I gotta say, Jona kinda killed it here.